* i have been going through the photos on my computer (over ninety thousand photos and videos so haven’t seen everything yet)
* i went through my whatsapp account
* still need to go through my imessage 
* and my old ssd if i can get it to work
* it feels so weird it feels heavy
* some photos that are “good” or funny to me are sad because many of the people in or associated with the photos are no longer in my life
* there are some photos that just carry only pain and no joy
* but i leave them here because they are a part of me
* i initially wanted to do this because there was a photo of my uncle from when he was younger that i wanted to put on this website 
* but as i started digging i found really deep cuts
* deep wounds
* so here i am exposing myself to myself
* maybe to you these pics are just pics and like yeah ok cool next cool next
* but for me there is the immense weight of emotion in these
* a lot of pain and sadness of the lost trajectories of my life
* a lot of sadness and pain for my younger self
* i really have learned to be happy now, but i suffered deeply for most of my life
* i am completely unraveled and naked before you 
* and it is now that i truly understand that forgetting is a blessing from god